Two Words
by Lila2
Summary: Courtney, on her wedding day
1. So it begins

Title: "Two Words"  
  
Author: Lila  
  
Spoiler: None  
  
Summary: Courtney, on her wedding day  
  
~ * ~  
  
"And please remember, that I never lied  
  
And please remember  
  
What I felt inside now, honey  
  
You gotta make it your own way  
  
But you'll be all right now, sugar  
  
You'll feel better tomorrow  
  
Come the morning light now, baby"  
  
- "Don't Cry," Guns N' Roses  
  
~ * ~  
  
I was supposed to be married one month ago today. It was going to be the most incredible day of my life. I'd found a real life white knight, a dashing prince who swept me off my feet and made all my dreams come true, at least for a little while. But dreams never really come true, do they?  
  
I never knew two words could hold so much power--but they do, and now I know it. Two words, said from such innocent lips, changed my entire life, spun my world on its axis, however you want to call it. All I know is that after that night my life was never the same again.  
  
It's unfortunate, you know. I certainly looked the part of the golden-girl princess. I'd never seen my eyes so bright, my smile so wide. I'd never seen myself look so happy, so in-love, like I was floating on air. I also never knew my heart could break, could shatter into a million tiny pieces I'll never put back together again.  
  
Everything was perfect. Sonny was back, Carly was glowing, Michael was adorable, Jason--I never got to see Jason at the altar. Knowing him, he looked uncomfortable and out of place, but still beautiful. It's too bad I'll never know.  
  
The last thing I remember is the music, soft and melodic behind the heavy oak doors. I'd sneaked a peak in the chapel and it was so beautiful it took my breath away. God, everything was beautiful about that day. I didn't even need to look in a mirror. All I had to do was look in my father's eyes to know I was beautiful, that he was proud, and he accepted my choice. That was all I needed to make my day perfect, the happiest day of my life. I held his arm for support before I opened those doors and married the man of my dreams before everyone I knew and loved. Only it never happened. Those two little words changed everything.  
  
Michael gripped the arms of his chair so tightly his little knuckles turned white. He was like a ghost, glassy-eyed and raspy-voiced and scared out of his mind. He turned to me and looked at me through Carly's brown eyes. "Mommy's gone," he whispered, his eyes huge in his pale face. "Mommy's gone."  
  
That's when I knew it was the end.  
  
My father raced inside, Sonny and Jason on his heels as our bewildered guests wondered what the hell happened to my special day. I never had an answer for them, not one they'd understand anyway. Sometimes life to complicated to explain to those who haven't lived it.  
  
Sonny crouched in front of Michael, begging him for answers, but all that little boy could say were those two words over and over again. I looked at Sonny, cringed at the pain and guilt marring his face, curling his features into a mask of grief. He was calm, a little too calm for Sonny, but the shock was temporarily numbing the anger. I didn't want to be around when the shock wore off. Out of the corner of my eye I saw Johnny and Max carefully move all breakables from his reach. I guess they were thinking the same thing. Even in this time of crisis their antics brought a smile to my face. I don't think I've smiled since.  
  
Jason stood behind him with my father, explaining away the wedding that wasn't going to happen. "Mike, can you do me a favor? Can you make an announcement saying that the wedding's been postponed, that there's a complication and it's going to happen, but just not tonight?" I let out a breath I didn't know I'd been holding and I smiled at his words, relieved that this wasn't the end, a temporary setback, but I was still going to have the wedding of my dreams, even if I had to wait a little while longer.  
  
I started towards him, intending to lend my support and comfort--but what I saw made me forget to breathe. His face was blank, his features carved in their usual emotionless mask of indifference, but his eyes--I'll never forget his eyes that night. Never in my life had I ever seen Jason afraid of anything, not even when he was staring down the barrel of a loaded gun. But that night all I could see was the anger, the pain, and the fear. It was the most terrifying thing I'd ever seen.  
  
I took a gasping breath and leaned against the wall for support as people milled around me--but my eyes never left Jason. In the distance I could hear the sounds of glass breaking, Sonny had finally lost it, but Jason remained insufferably calm. Even as his eyes blazed and his fist tightened with bitter rage, angry that something so precious to him had been stolen, he never raised his voice. But it was obvious something was wrong. I stood ten feet away, but I could feel the tension coiling around his spine, feel the anger humming from his body.  
  
Tears pricked the back of my eyelids and I pressed a shaky hand to my eyes. Now wasn't the time to cry, not in front of all these guests, not while my sister-in-law was missing. I could have my own personal pity party later. Right now I had to be strong for the people I loved. I snuck a glance at Jason's rigid figure--even if they didn't seem to love me back.  
  
Emily came out and immediately turned to Jason, laying a comforting hand on his arm. He answered her questions calmly, managing to keep the sting out of his voice, but his eyes never softened and they only got fierier as each minute ticked by and Carly was still missing. I had to look away for fear I'd be burned.  
  
"Are you all right?" she asked and he nodded stiffly, twisting out of her grip.  
  
"Yeah, I'm fine." So much for the boy who never lies. He was wound so tight I could see the tremor shiver down his spine from across the room.  
  
Emily didn't seem to get it though. "What happened?" She pressed. "What's going on?"  
  
Jason's mouth tightened into a grim line and his eyes seemed to blaze. "You know what?" he said and for the first time all night he lost his precious control. His voice was harsh, biting, and Emily took a nervous step back. I didn't have to look at her to see the fear in her eyes.  
  
"I can't--I really can't talk about it. Just--you know, just go home. I gotta go." And then he was gone.  
  
He never looked back. In fact, he never looked at me at all.  
  
~ * ~  
  
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	2. Leaving on a Jet Plane

Author's Note:   
  
Thank you for all your wonderful responses. Sorry it's taken so long to get this chapter out, but things have been insane at work and I haven't had time to work on it. It's a bit short, but it's more of a setup for the next chapter, which should be a lot longer. I hope you enjoy.   
  
~ * ~   
  
"Why does my heart feel so bad?   
  
Why does my soul feel so bad?"   
  
- "Why Does My Heart Feel so Bad," Moby   
  
~ * ~   
  
Carly's been missing for two weeks and we still have no idea where to find her. Ric's the number one suspect, but he's too good, too smooth. Jason's searched his house a dozen times and hasn't found a trace of Carly. Sonny isn't much better. He just wanders around the penthouse fondling rope and threatening to kidnap Elizabeth. Sometimes I wish he'd just kill her and get it over with. It would be wrong, but at least we'd get our lives back. I know Ric has Carly. We all know it. We just can't prove it. But if we had Elizabeth. . .no, we can't do that, even if it meant exchanging her life for Carly's.   
  
I know Carly's the one locked up and scared out of her mind, but my life isn't much better. Sonny's inconsolable, Michael's borderline catatonic, and I can count the number of times I've seen Jason on one hand. No one's mentioned my wedding that didn't happen, extended condolences, or made any attempt to comfort me. It's just Carly, Carly, Carly. It's like I don't even exist. All I do is tell them everything will be okay while they do nothing to soothe my pain. Even Jason, my fiancé, has yet to acknowledge what happened. Maybe I'm selfish or maybe I'm so angry that I'm hurting and no one seems to care, but sometimes I wish they'd never find Carly. Maybe then they'd know what it's like to have your heart stomped on, what it's like to finally find the one thing you've been waiting for your entire life, only to have it blow up in your face.   
  
No, I know they already feel that way. I can tell by the haunted look in Sonny's eyes, the fire burning in Jason's gaze. They've lost the only thing that matters to them and they won't stop until they find her. I can only hope things are different when they finally bring her home.   
  
~ * ~   
  
A month has gone by now and still no sign of Carly. I can't take it anymore. I'm sick of everyone acting like I'm not even here. The other night Jason came home early and it felt so good to have him with me again. It was the first time since Carly disappeared that we shared a bed. Before everything fell apart, we'd cuddle all night long and I would fall asleep with his arms wrapped tightly around me. But tonight he hugged his side of the bed, barely saying goodnight as he pulled the covers around him. I slid my palm across his bare chest and played with his hair, but he batted my hand away like I was an annoying pest.   
  
"Courtney, stop it," he said.   
  
"Jason, we haven't seen each other in weeks. I miss you."   
  
"I know," he sighed. "But I need to get some sleep. I have a busy day tomorrow."   
  
"Looking for Carly." The words came out harsher than I intended and he turned to look at me for the first time all night.   
  
"Of course for Carly. She's still out there somewhere, Courtney. She's pregnant and scared and she needs me."   
  
"What if I need you too?" This time I didn't bother trying to keep the anger out of my voice. "You're my fiancé, Jason. Remember our wedding? The one that didn't happen? A month ago all you wanted was to love and cherish me for the rest of your life and now you barely even look at me. You haven't touched me in weeks. What's happened to us, Jason?"   
  
It took him a long time to answer. "My best friend is missing, Courtney. You know what Carly means to me. I won't stop until I bring her home." He reached over and cupped my face in his palms. "Everything will be back to normal when she's home. I promise." He pressed a gentle kiss to my lips and turned over. "Goodnight."   
  
Later, as he slept calmly beside me, I pressed a hand to my mouth, where his kiss still lingered. It didn't feel right, but then again nothing felt right anymore. This thing with Carly--it's like a ghost hovering between us. She's haunting him, begging him to come after her and set her free. Sometimes I feel like I'm living my very own horror movie, only there's no happy ending. Nothing will be right between Jason and I, not until we exorcize Carly's ghost.   
  
The next morning he was gone, not even leaving a note to say when he'd be back. Not that I was surprised. Our apartment is only the place where he showers and changes his clothes. It's not a home anymore; it's a waystation on his search for Carly.   
  
And that morning, I decided I'd had enough. I was tired of listening to Michael babble "Mommy's gone" over and over again. I was tired of Sonny treating me like I was only Michael's babysitter, not his sister. And most of all I was tired of Jason and his Carly obsession, tired of the way he ignored our relationship and what we meant to one another, and above everything else, tired that I was no longer the most important person in his life.   
  
I probably should have thrown a glass or two, destroyed some furniture, it definitely would have been the safer choice, but it decided to take a little trip instead. I packed my bag, left a note for Sonny, and boarded the first flight out to Paris. It was just before noon when my plane took off and the sun was brilliant in a clear blue sky, a perfect summer day. I should have been out with Jason somewhere, maybe a picnic in the park or a ride on his bike, but instead I'm all alone while he tears Port Charles apart looking for Carly. I didn't tell him I was leaving and I didn't say when I'll be back.   
  
A long time go he told me I made him want to be alive, that I filled his life with a love he never thought he'd have. I believed him, once. I believed he was the only man I'd ever love and I was the only woman for him. I honestly believed he loved me more than he loved himself. Now I wonder if he'll even miss me while I'm gone.   
  
~ * ~   
  
I ended up at a beautiful apartment overlooking the Seine with a view of river boats and the Pont Alexander III in the distance. The hallway was light and airy and the doormat was covered in straw flowers. It was so different from my dark penthouse, even from the outside I could tell this was a place of love, a home. I was nervous about being here, after all, I wasn't really invited, but I needed to come anyway. If I ever planned on fixing my disaster of a relationship with Jason, I needed to do this.   
  
I took a deep breath, knocked soundly, and almost fainted when I came face to face with the last person on earth I'd see.   
  
Brenda stood on the other side of the door looking as confused as I felt. She looked good, well Brenda always looks good, but she looked better than the last time I'd seen her. Her hair was longer, darker, and straighter, and her face was a little fuller. There was a sparkle in her eyes I didn't recognize and I'd never seen her smile so honest. She leaned against the doorframe and watched me with laughing eyes. "Courtney," she said softy. "What are you doing here?"   
  
I couldn't keep the shock out of my voice. "Aren't you supposed to be in London?"   
  
She raised an eyebrow. "You didn't answer my question."   
  
From her nonchalant attitude I could tell she had no idea what was going on in Port Charles, but why would I expect her to? She'd left to make a fresh start, get her life together, and it's not like Carly's kidnapping would make big waves overseas. Besides, it's not like she and Carly were ever anything remotely close to friends. I decided now wasn't the time or place to fill her in. "I'm on a sort of business trip. Is Ro—" I started, but I never got to finish my sentence. A young woman appeared behind Brenda, probably only a few years older than me. She was petite and pretty, with long brown hair and big brown eyes. She wasn't drop-dead gorgeous like Brenda or sultry like Carly, but there was an honesty about her, a sense of inner strength and purity. I could see what Jason saw in her.   
  
"Hi," she said and looked to Brenda for an explanation. "Can I help you?"   
  
"I'm Courtney Matthews—"   
  
"She's Jason's fiancée," Brenda interrupted and looked pointedly at my ring.   
  
I resisted the urge to slip my hand in my pocket. "Are you Robin Scorpio?" I asked.   
  
"Yes. . ." Her voice was wary and she had her hand on the door.   
  
I smiled brightly. "I know this is a surprise considering we've never met, but I was wondering if I could talk to you."   
  
"Talk to me?"   
  
"Yeah, about Carly." A frown creased Robin's brow and the door inched closed. "Please don't send me away," I asked. "It's just that, Jason and I were supposed to be married two months ago and it never happened. You see, Carly was kidnapped the night of our wedding and she's still missing."   
  
Robin and Brenda's expressions both softened immediately. "Is everyone okay?" Robin asked.   
  
"Doing the best they can. Sonny's going crazy and Michael's completely freaked out, but they're holding up. It's Jason I'm really worried about. He's like a man possessed looking for her." Robin and Brenda exchanged a knowing look. "Do you think I could talk to you, about Jason and Carly?"   
  
Robin looked at Brenda. "It's your call," Brenda said and shrugged her shoulders. "You're the one with the info. Courtney, it was nice seeing you. I'm going to make some tea."   
  
"Use the instant!" Robin yelled. "I can't afford another visit from the firemen."   
  
"Yeah, yeah," came the reply. "I'll use the instant."   
  
Robin smiled and opened the door wider. "Why don't you come inside and we'll talk."   
  
~ * ~   
  
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	3. Sometimes the Truth Hurts

Author's Note:  
  
Sorry for the delay, but a little thing called Writer's Block and an "Alias" story I'm obsessed with writing got in my way of working on this. Thanks as usual for all the wonderful replies and responses. You guys are making this fun to write. Courtney's still in Paris here and we're getting towards the end of our story, probably just one or two more chapters. This chapter has gotten so long that I've divided it into two parts. Expect one part today and the next tomorrow. I hope you enjoy!  
  
~ * ~  
  
"And the trouble with the truth  
  
It's just what I need to hear  
  
Ringing so right deep down inside my ear  
  
And it's everything I want  
  
And it's everything I fear  
  
Oh, the trouble with the truth  
  
Is it's just what I need to hear."  
  
- "The Trouble with the Truth", Patty Loveless  
  
~ * ~  
  
Her house was nothing like I'd pictured it, but then again Robin Scorpio was nothing like I'd imagined she'd be. Jason had told me she was HIV positive and I'd imagined a frail, sad little thing, but Robin Scorpio was full of love and life. She was studying to be a doctor, specializing in AIDS research, and really wanted to make a difference in the world, "With the time I have left," she explained later. Brenda got teary-eyed when she said that and I watched jealously as Robin wrapped an arm around her shoulders and told her it was okay. My entire life I'd wanted a friend like that, someone who stood by me through thick and thin, someone who knew what I was thinking before I even uttered a single word. I thought I'd found that kind of friend in Carly, but now I'm not so sure. It's not like she did anything to me--it wasn't her fault she was kidnapped--but I don't know how I can face her after everything that's going on with me and Jason. If she didn't exist, Jason and I wouldn't be losing touch. But she does exist and she's the wedge driving us apart--and there doesn't seem to be anything I can do to stop it.  
  
I could hear Brenda grumbling in the kitchen and Robin laughed and told me to make myself comfortable while she got the tea.  
  
I went to her living room, full of bright furniture and big windows and a fluffy cat curled in the corner. The place was full of pictures. They were everywhere, lining every surface and the majority of the wall space. There were pictures of Sonny and Brenda, Ned and a dark-haired woman I didn't recognize; pictures of Mac Scorpio, Felicia, and her daughters; pictures of an older man and woman I guessed were Robin's parents; a picture of herself, Jason and Michael when he was a baby, and other pictures of Robin and friends like my father and brother and Brenda and Nikolas Cassadine. But most of all I noticed the photo of a boy with long black hair and deep, dark eyes gazing up at her with such love in his eyes it made me turn away. I couldn't bear to see that kind of love in another couple, especially when I was struggling so much with Jason.  
  
She caught my gaze and smiled gently, her expression far away. "That's Stone," she said softly and set down the tea tray. "He was the first boy I ever loved."  
  
I sat down and picked up a cup of tea. "What happened?"  
  
Her voice got very soft, almost a whisper. "He died. Of AIDS."  
  
"I'm so sorry."  
  
She smiled a little. "It was a long time ago. That's why Sonny gives so much money to the hospital," she continued. "Because of Stone. He was like a brother to him."  
  
"Sonny's my brother."  
  
Robin almost dropped her cup of tea. "Are you serious?" she asked and took a long look at my hair.  
  
"Yeah," I laughed. "Not much of a resemblance, I know, but we're related. Mike's my father."  
  
She nodded. "Mike's a great guy. He loves Sonny so much, even if he doesn't always show it in the best way."  
  
Brenda came in and plopped down in an armchair. "He was like a father to me too. Even after Sonny and I broke up he never forgot me."  
  
"He was so devastated when we thought you were dead, Bren," Robin added. "I think he cried for weeks."  
  
Brenda nodded and the two continued their trip down memory lane, their voices getting soft as they reminisced about the past. Suddenly, I felt very much the outsider. These two women had such history with the men I thought were my family, my rock.. Sonny and Mike and I might share blood, but Robin and Brenda had such a deeper connection to them. Sonny was a brother to Robin's boyfriend? Why hadn't anyone told me that story? Or Mike serving as a father figure to Brenda? I felt like I didn't know my family at all.  
  
Their laughter interrupted my thoughts and I felt even more left out when they began talking about someone named Lucy getting naked at some charity event called the Nurses' Ball. A naked lady was funny? It made me think of my stripping days I had to restrain a shudder.  
  
"Sorry," Robin said as she wiped tears of laughter off her cheeks. "I'm sure you didn't come to hear about Lucy and Katherine's feud."  
  
I smiled politely, never letting on that I had no clue who Lucy OR Katherine were. It was easier to play along like I had a connection to Port Charles or the people living there. It made me feel a little more involved in their conversation, a little more connected to my home. "That's all interesting, but I came to hear about Carly."  
  
"Right. You know, we didn't get a long very well. I'm not sure how much help I'll be."  
  
"That's an understatement," Brenda mumbled under her breath and Robin punched her lightly. Again, I felt that twinge of loneliness, that I had no friendship like theirs.  
  
"Anyway," Robin continued. "She was in love with Jason and he was in love with me. She could never quit grasp the concept that he wasn't going to leave me for her."  
  
I glanced up in surprise. Carly had been in love with Jason? I always knew she loved him, but was in love with him? "So what happened?" I managed to say.  
  
Robin regarded me curiously. "No one told you this story? Didn't you say you and Jason are engaged?"  
  
I could feel a flush creeping up my cheeks. This was obviously an important part of Jason's past. It was something I should know, but I didn't. What kind of fiancée was I if I didn't know some of the most significant events of Jason's life? "We don't talk about our pasts," I explained quickly. "We like to live in the present."  
  
"She used to be married to AJ," Brenda interjected and Robin nodded with understanding.  
  
"He didn't want to hear about my past with AJ so he never told me about his past with Carly."  
  
"But he told you about me?"  
  
"You're different. He said you taught him to love."  
  
Robin sighed. "Yeah, I guess that's true. Did he tell you anything about his accident?"  
  
"Not much, just that AJ wrapped him around a tree and he lost his memory."  
  
Robin and Brenda exchanged a glance and I again felt like I was missing something. Patience, I told myself, patience. Good things come to those who wait. I'd learn what I came for eventually, even if I'd have to sit through hours of inside jokes. "That's a very abridged version," Robin said. "I was still in high school when it happened. I had the biggest crush on Jason Quartermaine. He was the ultimate goody-goody. He was smart and funny, great athlete, charming, volunteered at the hospital. He was going to be a doctor and save lives. Everyone loved him, especially his family and the community and -"  
  
I couldn't help but laugh.  
  
"What?" Robin asked.  
  
"He sounds so. . .boring."  
  
Robin and Brenda both laughed at that. "Well, he kinda was, " Robin said. "But that all changed the night of the accident. AJ was driving drunk and Jason tried to stop him. He got in the car with him, and. . ."  
  
"And AJ wrapped him around a tree," Brenda finished.  
  
"When he woke up he had no memory of his life as a Quartermaine," Robin explained. "He had no memory of anything. His family, his friends, Keesha, she was his girlfriend at the time--he didn't remember any of them. He didn't remember me either."  
  
"Or me," Brenda added. "I was his prom date. He doesn't remember a thing."  
  
I almost dropped my teacup at that one. I'd seen Jason and Brenda together and I could not imagine them as friends, let alone prom dates. "Really?" I managed to ask.  
  
"Yup. He was a great date," Brenda said. "Romantic, handsome, we had the best time."  
  
"Ahem," Robin cleared her throat. "What about Jagger, Karen? Your plan?"  
  
Brenda threw a magazine at her. "Another story. Courtney wants to hear about Jason, remember?"  
  
"Sure, sure. We can air my past, but the minute we creep into yours it's time to change the subject. You don't play fair, Bren."  
  
"I never said I did. Now, back to Jason."  
  
I still wanted to hear about Brenda's "Plan," but this was my one and only chance to learn about Jason so I turned my attention back to Robin. "How did you and Jason meet, if he didn't remember you?"  
  
Robin sighed heavily and looked away for a moment. I met her gaze and realized she was staring at the portrait of her dead boyfriend. I think she said his name was Stone. "I guess to understand me and Jason you have to understand me and Stone," she started. "We fell in love when I was in high school, when Jason was off at college and in love with Keesha. He was this bad boy. He lived with Sonny over Sonny's strip club--"  
  
That time I did drop my tea. "Sonny's strip club! He ran a strip club?"  
  
"And got Jason's first girlfriend hooked on drugs, but that's another story," Robin quickly said. "Let me explain about Jason and then Brenda can tell you everything you ever wanted to know about your brother. Okay?"  
  
"Yeah," I said shakily. "I think I'd rather hear about Jason anyway. But Sonny really owned a strip club?"  
  
"Uh-huh. And he and Stone lived up there before they moved into the Penthouse. We met and fell in love, kind of like Romeo and Juliet. We even performed a scene once." Robin took a deep breath and looked at his photo again. "We used to compare ourselves to them. We didn't know it would really happen like in the play. My Uncle Mac--"  
  
"The Police Commissioner?" I interrupted.  
  
"Yes. He's my father's brother. My parents were dead and he's raised my since I was a little girl. A few years ago my mom turned up alive after all, but I didn't know that until I was grown. I spent a lot of my childhood with Mac. Anyway, he wanted to keep us apart. He thought Stone was bad for me, but I didn't care. I loved him and he loved me. Then we found out he had AIDS. He barely had a few months to live and right before he died I found out I was HIV positive. Everyone was devastated."  
  
"I'm so sorry," I said softly. Robin was even younger than me when all this had happened, when the man she loved died and she was dealt a life sentence. I couldn't imagine going through that  
  
"It's okay," she said and squeezed my hand. "I've had a long time to adjust and I've learned to live with it. I had a lot of people to help me too. Mac, Brenda, Sonny. . .everyone was wonderful after it happened. Jason helped a lot too, even if he wasn't trying. We met right after the accident. In fact, I was with him when he woke up, even if he didn't remember me. He couldn't remember anything: emotions, behavior, relationships, society. . .he was like a little kid in an adult body. He didn't know how to care about other people. He didn't even know what love was. I had to teach him that."  
  
"What do you mean?"  
  
"We met on this bridge one day. We were both feeling sorry for ourselves. He was dying under all the pressure from his family. They wanted him to be the boy Jason Quartermaine used to be and he didn't want to be that boy. He couldn't deal with being unable to remember them and all the expectations they heaped on him. He was looking for a way out."  
  
"And you gave it to him?"  
  
"Sort of. We were kind of the same. He couldn't remember his past and I didn't think I had a future. I was convinced I was going to die. I was angry and bitter and depressed. I was tired of pretending I was okay when I was dying inside. But Jason changed that. I could be myself around him and visa versa. I didn't expect him to be Jason Quartermaine. I just let him be. I had to show him everything: love, friendship, loyalty, trust. He didn't know a thing when we first met. He got a job with Sonny around then and found a purpose. We were just friends at first, but the more time we spent together the more we realized how much we needed each other. We were both so scared of life, of living. . .but he gave me a reason to live and I taught him how to live. We just fell in love."  
  
They sounded so innocent and naïve, so pure. No games, no false pretenses, just pure, true love. So unlike the first time I had fallen in love. All AJ had brought me was pain. Still, I managed to smile. "You make it sound so beautiful."  
  
"Love is always beautiful," Robin said. "At first at least." She gazed at the diamond on my finger. "As you know, it didn't last."  
  
"Because of Carly?"  
  
"For a lot of reasons, but yes, Carly had a lot to do with it."  
  
"I don't understand. You sound like the perfect couple, so incredibly in love and happy. What happened?"  
  
Brenda had been oddly silent this entire time and finally spoke up. "Because Jason turned into a mobster wannabe and wouldn't get rid of Carly. He treated Robin like a second class citizen when she was the woman he loved. And why? Because of that idiot Carly and her stupid promises. . ." she would have gone on and on, but Robin laid a hand on her arm and she stopped ranting with a huff.  
  
"It's not that simple, Courtney," Robin explained.  
  
I was a little taken aback by Brenda's reaction. I could understand her being angry with Carly because of Sonny, but what had Carly done to Robin that was so evil? "How so?" I finally asked.  
  
Again, a long sigh. This story was getting more and more complicated by the second. "Carly came to town around the time Jason and I first met. She and Jason began sleeping together. I couldn't because of my HIV, I was too afraid of Jason becoming infected, and he didn't know it wasn't okay to sleep with one person and love another. As soon as he figured things out he broke it off, but she became obsessed with him."  
  
It took me a moment to digest the information: Jason and Carly had been sexually involved. They weren't just friends; they were former lovers. That added a whole new dimension to their relationship.  
  
"How did they meet?" I asked.  
  
Robin bit her lip. "I'm not sure exactly. It as at Jakes', the bar near Cortlandt Street. All I know about Carly was that she came to Port Charles to steal her mother's husband-"  
  
"Bobbie's not married."  
  
"Not anymore, but she was then."  
  
"To Tony Jones," Brenda piped in. "He kidnapped Robin."  
  
Robin noted my startled expression. "Brenda," she sighed. "Why do you have to make this so complicated?"  
  
"I just want Courtney to know what she's getting into when she calls Carly her best friend."  
  
Robin looked surprised. "Carly's your best friend?"  
  
I nodded stiffly. "She was. Now I'm beginning to wonder if I ever knew her."  
  
"Do you want to hear this?" Robin asked. "We can stop if you want. It can be hard to hear the people you love aren't who you think."  
  
I know how that goes. I thought Jason would love me forever and now I'm beginning to doubt if he loves me at all, or if I'm just a substitute because he can't have Carly. The more I hear about the two of them the less I want to know. Friends, lovers? What else was I going to hear? I took a deep breath, looked long and hard at my ring. I was Jason's fiancée, I was the woman would marry, I was the woman he would love forever. What harm could a little talk do? "Sure," I said and pasted on a thin smile. "Tell me everything you know."  
  
~ * ~  
  
Please, please, please respond! 


End file.
